A “Part-time” Mother

By Anna Chan Choi Cheng & Gary Lai Io Fai

Even with the financial assistance from her parents, Noel Wu, a post-80s expectant mother, says she cannot devote all her time to taking care of her child and family. She is going to resume work after the childbirth, and be a “part-time mother”.

“it’s impossible for me to resign and be a full-time mother,” says Noel Wu, 25, a hospital nurse. She and her husband got married in August 2009. Now she is pregnant, and expects to give birth to her first child in June. She says she will have her mum to take care of the newborn, while she will resume her work.

Macao’s economy has soared dramatically over the past 10 years. Casinos and tourists are seen everywhere, and the unemployment rate has been kept low. Yet the economic growth has led to the issue of inflation—commodity prices have risen. Common people, especially the post-80s generation who just start working and have little savings, suffer a lot. In particular, the increase in property prices is far greater than the increase in people’s salary. New couples and expectant parents need much more money than the older generations did in the past in order to start a family.

As in Wu’s case, a 500-square-foot used flat cost her and her husband about MOP1.5 million. “The house prices nowadays are extraordinarily high,” she says. “The post-70s could afford flats with their salaries and savings. However, the post-80s can hardly do so without parents’ help.” Therefore, Wu decides to continue to be a full-time nurse after giving birth to her child, as she understands that they have a heavy financial burden both for mortgage payment and child raising.

Yet the financial burden of the new couple does not originate here. Their wedding ceremony plus the wedding banquet already consumed a lot of their savings. Wu says she would have had only a wedding march and ceremony held in church. But the traditional Chinese wedding banquet was held because she did not want to violate the parents’ will. “I think the post-80s do not like having a wedding banquet, as it takes a lot of money, effort and time,” she says, adding that it cost them several thousands of dollars despite the “red pockets” they received in the banquet.

Similar to dealers and other people working for casinos and hotels, Wu has to work rotating shifts with different time frames each week and to take turns sharing the burden of night work in the hospital. In fact, it has become a typical characteristic in Macao that people work rotating shifts. Quite a lot of post-80s people do not mind working rotating shifts, as this kind of jobs usually offer higher salaries.

Wu does not want to work rotating shifts, but her ambition is to be a nurse, which means she has to devote more time on working than on preparing for the childbirth. She knows that this irregular working schedule is not good for her health and her baby’s health. Nor does it allow her to have good preparation for being a mother. “I cannot participate in those workshops which train expectant mothers parenting skills to take a good care of their newborn babies,” says Wu. “My mum will be the one to take care of my child. In order to do so, she will resign from her work after I give birth to her grandson.”

Apart from taking care of the newborn baby, Wu’s parents also play an important role in the new couple’s daily life. Wu does not have all essential skills that a typical housewife and mother needs; therefore, she still depends on their parents for filling in those gaps. “I know nothing about cooking, even my husband knows better than me,” she says. “My husband and I usually have meals outside, at our parents’ home, or simply order take-away.” Concerning that the food outside contains too much seasoning which is bad for the health, she needs her parents for cooking daily meals, especially for the newborn baby.

Very soon, Wu will give birth to her child. Despite facing the soaring cost of living, pressure from work and challenge on child-raising, she is excited and looking forward to welcoming her newborn baby. “I know I cannot perform round-the-clock parental duties, but I wish I can give my baby everything possible,” Wu says. “I feel I am very lucky to have all kinds of supports from my parents and my husband,” adding that they give her courage to be optimistic although she could only be a “part-time” mother.